This is a serious question. Don’t white people need bootlegs, too? I don’t dig R. Kelly and I’m not too big on Tearria Marie. I really want The Killers’ album but I’m tired of dodging the RIAA with this illegal downloading. This isn’t a game?I asked a black bootleg man if he had Maroon 5 and he looked at me like, “Wha??” That was obviously a bust. So white people, I need you to help me: hook me up with the caucasian bootleg man!

You’re out there, white bootleg man. If not, then this is the perfect opportunity for some young white hustlers to get a come-up. Or some black hustlers can expand their repertoire. You wouldn’t belive how ripe the streets are for a $5 DVD of Wedding Crashers. Owen Wilson is cute!!

The suburbs is watchin’. Get this paper.